Tuesday, July 05, 2011

The Asshole at the Party

Once you have children over the age of one, you find it necessary to rearrange your social life around other friends with kids. For one thing, going to the home of another family with young children means you won't spend the whole time shadowing your child, shrieking things like "No! The crystal vase is not for licking!" For another, they won't look at you like you're insane if you suggest a 5pm dinnertime.

I've always found it easier to invite over friends whose children are roughly the same age as, or slightly younger than, The Kid. Those with an older child (unless we're talking teenagers or girls) are, um, difficult. The older kids are bored with The Kid's toys, or want to use them in, let's say, "creative" new ways that involve lots of "pow pow!" noises, or things getting stuck in trees. Sometimes those things are other, smaller children.

This weekend, we were invited to a lovely 4th of July cookout with family friends. The Kid, who'd pretty much been a jerk all weekend after a stomach bug upset his sleep cycle, was excited for the party and promised to behave well. Ha ha ha.

When there were only three children - mine and two 3 year olds - it was lovely. Then there were more small children. And then suddenly The Kid was pushing a 2 year old backwards into a wading pool, while my husband and I had the silent, telepathic "you be the parent, I'm enjoying my adult conversation over here" fight. (I lost.)

So yes, my charming child has now become the asshole at the party. I need a compensation prize. Maybe a margarita.


Blogger VickiB said...

Good thing you can still supervise him. Frat parties also have pools and liquor.

7/06/2011 9:14 AM  
Blogger The back of the hill said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

7/06/2011 5:15 PM  
Blogger The back of the hill said...

I never got the chance to be the a-hole at the party.
Instead, I was often the kid hiding under the table.

Until high-school, that is. pools and liquor.

7/06/2011 5:16 PM  
Blogger Tzipporah said...

One of my favorite bloggers is apparently the person hiding in the bathroom with a bottle of wine during parties. Another hides in the broom closet.

7/07/2011 5:41 PM  

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