Monday, February 26, 2007

Purim responses to synagogue break-in...

OK, after stewing about the break-in and vandalization (see my last post) for days, my relentlessly irreverent self has come up with something too awful to keep to myself.

Purim responses to the break-in:
  1. Find the offenders' double-wides, break-in, and vandalize *their* sacred objects (TV and beer cooler?)
  2. Require them to enter a beauty pageant to be judged by the Shrub.
  3. Make them sit in on a 2,000-class lecture series on the laws of sofrut. And then make a Purim spiel out of it. To be performed in costume. And filmed. And put on YouTube.

Any other ideas?

1 Comments:

Anonymous The Back of the Hill said...

The beer cooler doubles as a coffee table.

And while the interminability of a 2000 class lecture series on sofrus would punish them, yes, it might also turn them into scribes or leastways semi-educated. Far too good a reward for them.

I, instead, would love to see them have an unlimited supply of whatever cheap plonkum beer they favour. With, as unrevealed codicil to that sentence, a clause that terminates thier beer supply when their habit reaches half a dozen sixpacks each per day.

At which point they will not be able to distinguish between 'cursed be Haman' and 'blessed be Mordechai'.
Not able. Not ever. Not ever again.

2/26/2007 4:38 PM  

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